funnies

Kelli, in a Russellville, AK, rest stop: "I hate this whole place."

Mom: "I'm as cool as a coupon!"

Grandma: "People are going all hotsie potsie on me!"
Me: "What does that mean?"
Grandma: "It means no one wants to have ice cream."

Rachel: "Why does water stay logged in your ears?"
Dad: "Capillary action, I presume."

Kelli: "What famous person would you be?  You can keep the good parts and get rid of the bad parts."
Rachel: "Helen Keller.  Minus all the bad parts."

Grandma: "I've got more gloves than Peter has Paul."

Grandma: "What are you doing with all those pictures?"
Mom (joking): "Throwing them out."
Grandma: "Oh yeah, you are... like the bird in the bush."

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[The tent] was now packed inside the beaded bag, which, Harry was impressed to learn, Hermione had protected from the Snatchers by the simple expedient of stuffing it down her sock.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows